Why Can’t I Control My Dreams? Here Are the Causes & Cures


Controlled dreaming

Many people who want to experience controlled dreaming wonder why it can be a difficult skill to acquire. There are two types of people who wonder why they cannot control their dreams. The first type are those people who do not realise that they are dreaming and want to know why they can’t enter the state known as lucid dreaming, where they have full control over their dreams. The second type do actually experience lucid dreaming but find that they cannot control their lucid dreams.

In this article I will give explanations to both non-lucid dreamers and lucid dreamers as to why they cannot control their dreams. I will also discuss the many easy-to-use techniques available to both dream-types so anyone can enjoy the state of controlled dreaming.

Let’s begin with the non-lucid dreamers who want to know why they cannot become conscious in their dreams and control them. If you are already a lucid dreamer, but just have no control over your dreams, you can skip to the appropriate section.

When you don’t realise you are dreaming but want to control your dreams

There are those people who really want to enjoy some, or all, of the experiences that controlled dreaming offers – from enjoying their fantasies to develing deep into their own psyche. These people are eager to know why they can’t control their dreams and what they can do to change that.

Unfortunately, for people who are unaware that they are dreaming while in a dream, it is difficult to exhibit any control over the dreamworld.

In order to control your dreams you must first enter a conscious state while you remain in the dream – you literally wake up within the dream. In other words, you must be fully aware that you are dreaming and have the same type of conscious awareness and focus that you have when you are awake.

This conscious dream awareness is usually all that is required to gain full control the dream. It is commonly referred to as lucid dreaming. If you are not a lucid dreamer then you will never be able to control your dreams. Let’s delve a bit deeper into this subject.

Why can’t I control my dreams?

If you are the type of person who has never experienced lucid dreaming but remember your dreams, and sometimes have vivid ones that feel real, then you may wonder why you cannot control them. There is a simple explanation for that.

You can’t control your dreams because you do not know that you are dreaming. While dreaming your subconscious mind is in control and while it remains dominant you will have no conscious control over your dreams. However, through training you can become conscious during your dreams and take full control over them.

As the dreamworld lies securely in the domain of the subconscious mind most people remain fairly unconscious during their dreams. At times though we all have very vivid dreams that feel very real while we are dreaming and it seems strange that we are unable to control even these type of dreams.

The simple reason you cannot control a non-lucid dream is because you do not realise that you are dreaming. Your conscious mind is merely a spectator of the dream while your subconscious mind molds it.

The fix for this is equally simple – all you have to do to gain full conscious control over your dreams is to learn how to lucid dream. To do this you can follow the advice in our free lucid dreaming course or go a step further and join a lucid dreaming community with very advanced lucid dreaming training that teaches to become a kick-ass lucid dreaming jedi.

When you learn how to train you train your brain to become conscious during the dream state and which point you are in a much better position to control that dream. For most people just becoming lucid in a dream is enough to give them control over it.

Why can’t I lucid dream?

If you are aware of the phenomenon known as lucid dreaming, and understand that it is a gateway to controlled dreaming, but find it difficult to do it, there can be a few possible reasons.

If you have tried but can’t lucid dream there are usually 2 possible causes. 1. You are not using proven induction techniques and doing reality checks. 2. You are not being persistent in the use of those techniques and reality checks. The good news is that anyone can lucid dream if they train themselves properly.

If you are a person who has tried to lucid dream but find that you are unable to do it, there is hope. However, this is such a large topic that it requires much more space than is available in this article. Luckily, I covered this very subject matter in a previous article for people who find it hard to lucid dream. I urge you to read that for ways to overcome your current lucid dreaming challenges.

Believe it or not, lucid dreaming is a lot more common than you may think and anyone can learn this skill when they follow a proven lucid dreaming plan and are persistent in their efforts – persistence is the most essential element for successful lucid dreaming. But, trust me, it is well worth the effort!

Be aware though that, although lucid dreaming usually means controlled dreaming, there are a small group of lucid dreamers who struggle to control their dreams. Let’s take a look at the causes of that.

When you know you’re dreaming but can’t control the dream

If you are already a lucid dreamer but find that, although you become conscious during the dream state, you cannot control the dream then the following advice is for you.

Rest assured that you are actually in a very strong position to experience controlled-dreaming because you have already conquered the hardest and most important step – becoming consciously aware (lucid) in your dreams.

Why can’t I control my lucid dreams

Lucid dreamers who cannot control their lucid dreamers are few in number. This is because the very act of becoming conscious in a dream is usually enough to give you control over the dream. However, some lucid dreamers do struggle with this aspect of lucid dreaming.

If you find that you can’t control your lucid dreams it will be because you are either not fully conscious in the dream or that you have not trained yourself to use “intention” within a lucid dream. Both causes have easy fixes and can be quickly addressed to give you full control over all your lucid dreams.

So, if you are having trouble controlling your lucid dreams it will be for one of the following reasons:

  1. You are not actually fully conscious in the dream and just think you are.
  2. You are not using your conscious “will” and intention properly to control things in the dream.

These two causes of a lack of control in a lucid dream deserve separate explanations and cures.

Not being fully conscious can mean a lack of control in the dream state

By far the biggest cause for a lack of control within a lucid dream is not being truly conscious in it., i.e. you are not actually lucid dreaming!

Many people confuse vivid dreams with lucid dreams and this may be the cause of your seeming lack of lucid dreaming control.

Although the term lucid dreaming was originally coined to refer to any dream that was vivid and life-like in nature (even those dreams that were uncontrolled), the modern definition of the term has come to mean vivid life-like controlled dreaming.

Some dreams feel very real and very life-like. While you are dreaming everything feels like it is really happening. A life-like dream, like those from which you awake and wonder if it really happened or get confused as to why you are in your room and not in the place where you were dreaming you where, are vivid dreams. They are not lucid dreams.

A lucid dream feels just as real as real life and is actually indistinguishable from real life. However, in a lucid dream you realise that you are dreaming and become fully conscious and aware just like you are now while reading these words.

Although you can never get physically hurt in a lucid dream this type of dream can feel so real that it is possible, in extreme cases, to develop false memories. That’s how real a lucid dream feels (there are very specific reasons for this). For example, if you continue to repeat a specific “normal” activity in multiple lucid dreams it is possible to confuse the memories of those events with real life events. Though this is very rare, and there are steps you can take to avoid it happening, it does go to illustrate just how real lucid dreams feel.

So, be sure that you are actually fully conscious in your dream, and that you are not confusing a vivid dream with a lucid dream, before determining that your lucid dreams lack control.

If you are unsure as to whether you are experiencing vivid dreams or lucid dreams and want to know exactly what a lucid dream feels like read this article.

Now, having vivid dreams does not mean you are destined to never control your dreams. Quite the contrary actually. As you are already experiencing very vivid life-like dreams you can very quickly train your mind to “wake you up” within those dreams and once you do that you will gain full control over them.

The easiest fix to moving from having vivid dreams to having lucid dreams is to use a good lucid dreaming course.

There’s more good news! Once you learn how to lucid dream and have your first controlled dream it gets easier and easier every time you do it.

For those of you who are absolutely certain that you are experiencing lucid dreams, and not just vivid dreams, but find that you still have no control over them please then read on.

Using intention to control your lucid dreams

If you find that you are in fact experiencing genuine lucid dreams, where you are aware that you are dreaming and are fully conscious (like you are now), but are still unable to control those dreams then you are likely not using the power of intention.

Literally all you have to do in a lucid dream to take control over something is to “will” it, or “intend” it, to happen. In fact, many lucid dreamers will speak their desires aloud and ask the dream to create what they want.

Intention is all that is required to make something happen in a lucid dream. No matter what you want to happen, all you have to do is intend it to happen and it will – or at least it should.

I cannot stress enough that if you find yourself unable to control your dream you are probably not lucid dreaming and are, in fact, only experiencing a very vivid dream that you actually believe is real.

However, if you find that you know for sure that you are in a dream, and you are just as awake mentally as you are now while you read this page, yet your your dream remains unresponsive to your intentions then you may require enrollment in an advanced lucid dreaming course.

A good advanced lucid dreaming course, such as this one, will include access to a community of other lucid dreamers who can help you deal with your challenges. Sometimes it takes just a little tweak, one small tip or trick, and suddenly you gain god-like powers over your dreamworld.

Additionally, individual interaction in a lucid dreaming community can help you make quantum leaps with your controlled dreaming experiments. Just one interaction with an experienced lucid dreamer can often be enough to help you through any lucid dreaming challenge. Something you mention in a community message, that seems normal to you, may be all that is required to tip-off an experienced lucid dreamer to why you are having problems and allow them to give you the appropriate advice.

So, first ensure that you are definitely lucid dreaming. Then test your intention within your lucid dreams. Finally, get some advanced techniques from a good lucid dreaming course.

Why can’t I control myself in my dreams

If you find that you cannot control yourself in your dreams it will be because you are not lucid dreaming.

Not being able to control yourself and your own actions in a dream is normal. The subconscious mind is in control in dreams while your conscious mind is merely an observer. However, it is possible to learn how to gain full control over yourself and everything else in a dream, while you experience everything as though it were real life. 

Learning to control yourself is not the only benefit of learning how to lucid dream however. When you learn how to lucid dream you can not only control yourself, you can control everyone else and everything else within the dream. And, what’s more, it all feels just as real as the real world!

You can learn how to lucid dream by using proven lucid dreaming techniques , though if you want to do it quicker you can use a lucid dreaming course.

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